How to Lose Your Mind Watching Cats, a Step-By-Step Guide

I’d like to think of myself as a rational person, one who makes measured, well-thought out decisions. Sometimes, I make impulsive decisions, however. These are almost always bad decisions. My latest impulsive decision was to watch last year’s critically panned adaptation of the musical Cats. I have no idea what I expected, but all the internet chatter about how bad this movie is still didn’t prepare me for what I was to witness. I thought about giving it a conventional review, but this is not a conventional movie. So, instead I wrote this, a guide to watching Cats. I sacrificed my sanity, so you don’t have to sacrifice yours. You’re welcome.

Beware, there be spoilers . . . and incredibly creepy cats.

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